They say that 70% of women do not experience an orgasm during intercourse. Further, research shows that 10% of women do not experience an orgasm AT ALL in their lifetimes. This does not sound well for us, ladies!
However, knowledge is power, right? If you know why you’re not reaching that climax then that means you can figure out how to reach it eventually. So, just for you, following are a few, but very important tips on how you can finally reach the Big O. If, on the other hand, you’re already experiencing it, then read on too to find out how to make the pleasure even more excruciating!
Problem #1. You ‘faked it’ and it’s now working against you.
A lot of women ‘fake it’ during the first couple of times with their lovers. There are several reasons for doing this.
For one, you may want your man to think you’re a sex goddess. After all, all that carnal screaming must mean that you’re sooo into it, right? And subconsciously, you may be thinking that if you paint this hot, erotic woman in bed, he’ll want you more.
Secondly, if you don’t come, then you might hurt his ego, so you just go on and fake it.
Thirdly, perhaps you’re not comfortable enough with yourself and about your body so you just fake it rather than face the fact that you can’t orgasm at all.
What to do: Stop faking and get real. If you keep on faking your orgasm, you’ll never reach a stage when you actually do reach one. Think about it. You’re not really helping your lover pleasure you by giving him the wrong signs. He may think you like something when it fact, that ’something’ does not do anything for you at all.
So here’s what you do: tonight, moan only if what he’s doing is REALLY turning you on. In short, react only if there’s something worth reacting about. Don’t worry, he’ll be able to tune in to what turns you on soon enough.
If he ever asks about this ’sudden change’ in you, just say that you’ve been masturbating and just discovered new erogenous zones!
Problem #2. You can’t get off… without a little help from you’re favorite toy.
A lot of women experience their first orgasms with the aid of a sex toy. Nothing to be ashamed about here; women need to explore their own bodies and find out what turns them on so they can guide their men. However, if it comes to a point where you cannot reach a climax without the aid of, say, your vibrator, then we have a problem.
What to do: combine technology and reality in bed. That’s right; don’t go ‘cold turkey’ on your vibrator or dildo. Instead, bring it with you to bed the next time you make love with your man. If this freaks him out or if you think this will hurt his ego, then this is the perfect time to make his voyeur fantasies come to life.
After foreplay and just before he penetrates you, grab your sex toy and engage in self-love in front of him. This is sure to drive him W-I-L-D.
You can bring yourself just to the brink and then drop the toy and welcome your man. You can also hand the toy over to him to use on you! If you want to go one step further, hand him the toy so he can use it on your clitoris as his penetrates you.
Problem #3. You can’t let go in bed.
This is actually a more common problem than you think. Thanks to many adult AND romantic movies, we have a very unrealistic idea of how sex should be in bed. It’s all about the pose and ‘looking sexy’. As such, we can’t let go and just lose ourselves into the moment. What do we fear? Fanny farts, squeaky wet sounds during intercourse, even how we LOOK while we orgasm is a concern.
In short, your brain is too busy trying to ‘look sexy’ that you become disconnected to what your body is feeling. Get this: you need your mind to clear up and focus on the pleasures your body is feeling!
For instance, while on top (and in clear view), instead of thinking “is my face all distorted and funny looking?”, just focus on what your clitoris wants and give in!
Besides, men prefer seeing their women ‘just let go’. For one, he knows you’re not faking it and secondly, hey, he’s not that perfect either you know!
Problem #4. You keep comparing yourself to other women.
So you heard that Mary came so hard and loud that she swears she almost fainted. As a result, you tend to compare your climax with hers and you’re disappointed that yours did not even make you dizzy.
What to do: For one, consider the fact that Mary lying! Secondly, women are all built differently so one’s climax level need not be the same as yours. And thirdly, there are techniques you CAN try to make your climax a bit more earth-shaking.
Try this: the next time you make love, try to put your head over the mattress. This is not really difficult because as he thrusts, more often than not, you’re pushed out of bed anyway. Just make sure that this time your head is not against the headboard.
This move has something to do with stretching your upper body. As your head dangles off the bed, your upper body is stretched and slightly raised. As he thrusts, he gets to hit your g-spot more!
So, feeling like you want to come in a big way tonight, follow the tips above and see whine one works best for you.
{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }
I think that all women are capable of having a G-Spot orgasm.. the problem is that the G-Spot is treated like some kind of gynecological UFO and women think it doesn’t exist. I believe it’s there and I think most women have it but don’t realise they do. When I read stats that say 25% of women don’t have a G-Spot.. makes me think they’re not looking hard enough! Education about finding the G-Spot in pretty poor.. speak to a lot of women and they don’t know where it is or how to find it. You need to apply pressure and direct stimulation.. for many women regular sex just doesn’t do it. If you haven’t had an orgasm through sex it doesn’t mean that you don’t have a G-Spot. Ladies.. get yourself a G-Spot vibrator.. figure out where your G-Spot is and then teach your partner. Have a bit of faith and I think you’ll learn something new!